Hey Women Entrepreneurs,
You know how I love to find wonderfully interesting articles written by very clever people, well here is another on by Margaret Heffernan | August 10, 2010. Again, I thought I would add my 2 1/2 cents worth of thoughts to this very intelligent article. Margaret’s thoughts are in black and mine are in gray.

Industrial companies put a lot of effort into “asset integrity” — which really just means protecting critical plants and machinery from damage and wear and tear. At companies like BP, it’s clearly more of an aspiration than a reality, but anyone trained in a manufacturing environment learns that asset integrity is a top priority. But what about service industries — companies where the only assets are the brains of the people who work there? Shouldn’t they worry about asset integrity, too? Astonishingly, most of them don’t. Instead, financial services, consulting, the law and even the medical profession perpetuate working hours where all-nighters are heroic, driving with jet lag is the norm and anyone who actually has lunch risks becoming lunch.Wow, not that we are encouraged to go the extra 26 miles, but haven’t you felt at times that people who aren’t working overtime, are real slackers.

But, they argue, we’re in the midst of an economic downturn, the worst recession in our lifetimes. Shouldn’t we all be working as hard as we can? Who has the luxury of time? What do you mean weekends aren’t for working? I certainly know that when I take a weekend off I feel guilty. After all in a small company, there is so much to be done. But then I realized they are probably using that same logic for large companies.

Well, for the last 100 years, every productivity study in every industry has come to the same conclusion: after about 40 hours in a week, the quality of your work starts to degrade. You make mistakes. That’s why working 60 hours may not save you time or money: you’ll spend too much of that time fixing the mistakes you shouldn’t have made in the meantime. That’s why software companies that limit work to 35 hours a week need to employ fewer QA engineers: there isn’t as much mess to clean up. Oh now I get it. Now I know why the computer geeks are playing most of the time. It keeps them sharp and creative. I need to slow down so that I can be sharper.

In a knowledge economy, where thinking and creativity are the raw materials from which products and profit flow, brains are assets. They need to be cherished, nurtured and protected, not abused. Leaders need to take seriously a century’s evidence that 1) overwork doesn’t make us productive, it makes us stupid, 2) looking away from a problem is often the best way to solve it, and 3) burnout is what happens when people are asked to work in ways that obliterate all other parts of their lives. I guess this means we really need to fan the flames of FUN and relaxation. This is very difficult for a struggling work-a-holic.

Also: we need to hammer the last nail into the coffin of multi-tasking. No, don’t take away my multitasking. It is the last great justification for those of us who suffer from severe ADD. We can tell everyone we are simply great multi-taskers and that is why we had to put the load of laundry in on our way to feed the dog, which reminded us that our child’s dinosaur costume for the play needed to be hemmed, so on our way to get the green thread, we stopped to water the plants, after-all – they are green. No, you can’t safely drive and hold conference calls, nor can you text while driving. And checking emails while in meetings means you may as well not be there. What modern businesses need isn’t distracted Blackberry addicts but human beings who haven’t forgotten the gifts of focus, concentration and mindfulness. Can’t you see my kids faces when next Christmas they open up boxes with words inside and I tell them I want them to have the gifts of focus, concentration and mindfulness?

When the cognitive scientist Dan Simons looked at the vast mountain of evidence that demonstrates the futility of multitasking, he was inevitably asked whether there were anything we could do to enlarge the capacity of our minds. The answer was an emphatic “no.” There are hard limits to what our brains will do, and no amount of Baby Mozarts or Brain Trainers will alter that. Practice, Simons says, will improve specific skills but not general abilities. Doing Sudoko will make you better at Sudoko; it won’t raise your GMAT scores. I did read a study that said that conversation with others,  you know, interacting with real human being for just 15 to 30 minutes a day did more for keeping your brain active and fully functioning than math problems, Sudoko or even watching reruns of Seinfield.

Is there anything that truly enhances cognition? Yes, says Simons: exercise.  Again with the exercise. You would think we were given legs to walk or something. Experiments by his colleague Arthur Kramer showed that walking for a few hours a week led to large improvements on cognitive tasks. Stretching and toning exercises had no cognitive benefits, (I could have guessed that seeing as how I have several friends who are serious body-builders) but aerobic exercise, which increases blood flow to the brain, did. Seniors who walked for just 45 minutes a day for three days a week showed better preservation of their brains in MRI scans. Exercise, Simons concludes, improves cognition broadly by increasing the fitness of your brain. Well there you have it. The knee bone’s connected to the frontal cortex and the ankle bone’s connected to the cerebellum. Okay, so the words don’t rhyme as well as the original but it is an important fact for us to consider.

Care about asset integrity? Get out of the office and go for a walk. And make sure the people who work for you do, too. Since I first read Margaret’s article I have made my husband get up and walk with me everyday. He is definitely getting stronger, but the asset integrity, well, we are still working on it.

Dawn L Billings is the author of over 20 books and hundreds of articles on parenting, relationships, entitlement and networking and an ardent advocate for womens and children’s issues. Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Womens Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory, The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organization and online community, and the creator of the new parenting toy/tool called Capables. In 2008 Dawn was selected by Oprah Magazine and The White House project as one of 80 emerging women leaders in the nation. Find out more and buy Dawn’s books To learn more about women networking check out our videos

by Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Womens Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory and The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organizations and communities.

As many of you know I have been in moving h**l over the last couple of months. I have shared many of the traumas of the moves from both Oklahoma and Atlanta to Mesa, AZ, but I haven’t shared the Awwwwwwh moments. I am just now recovering from my heat exhaustion, don’t move in the hottest part of summer (actually don’t move at all) but especially in the hottest part of summer. When I wasn’t busy using what few unboiled brain cells I had left to think of creative ways to prevent my body from combusting from excessive heat exposure, I was packing furiously. One of the wonderful things about packing a home that you raised your children in is that you get to rediscover treasures from the past.

While cleaning out my son’s boxes from the attic, I had a “Toy Story” experience and found myself melting both figuratively and literally as I opened the boxes to decide what to keep and what needed to find a new home.

I found my oldest son Tony’s Donald Duck. Oh how he loved Donald Duck. I also found his “Baby” which was the name of his baby blanket that he was never without. Donald was no longer white but rather a dingy gray with part of his sweet eyes scraped off from being dragged everywhere my small child traveled.

I also found Diny, that was the dinosaur stuffed animal that my youngest son Corbin was never without. These precious stuffed animals were not toys. They were living members of the family.

I carefully packed them and brought them to Arizona where my now 31 year-old Tony and 22-year-old Corbin lit up at the site of them. It doesn’t matter how old we are when we are reunited with an old and dear friend. The site of their best friends caused each of their eyes to glow with emotion.

The majority of toys from their childhood have long since been given away to younger cousins, eaten by new puppies or sold at garage sales, but not Donald and Diny. They are with our family for the long haul and actually are the inspiration for me creating the Capables, the new parenting tool and toddler toy that helps parents teach their children they are truly capable of greatness.

How cool that I can keep the legacy of love and connection going from my children to their children and now children around the world.

What about you,? Do you ever find yourself longing for a certain stuffed toy from your past? Share stories about your favorite friends as well.

Dawn L Billings is the author of over 20 books and hundreds of articles on parenting, relationships, entitlement and networking and an ardent advocate for womens and children’s issues. Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Womens Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory, The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organization and online community, and the creator of the new parenting toy/tool called Capables. In 2008 Dawn was selected by Oprah Magazine and The White House project as one of 80 emerging women leaders in the nation. Find out more and buy Dawn’s books To learn more about women networking check out our videos

Those of you that know me, know how passionate I am about the Direct Selling industry.  I love helping a woman go from “I don’t know if I can do this…” to “I can do ANYTHING I set my mind to!”

Direct Selling consultants especially, need to understand that women do business with those that they like and trust.  Direct Selling consultants who build relationships at a Heart Link Network event are setting the foundation for business to take place naturally. When she gets “linked” and develops relationships, her business grows!

Before Dawn recruited me to be the President for The Heart Link Network, I was a top performer with a direct selling company that focused on kitchen-tools… I was with that company for about 8 years.

My first experience with Direct Sales was when I got invited to a kitchen-tool party.  I was 23 years old, and I will admit…  I had to be DRAGGED there. I had heard from friends about these types of parties and a few of their bad experiences.  I imagined a sales consultant holding customer’s car keys hostage until a purchase was made.

My friend said she’d go WITH me and that the “kitchen lady” would be cooking a dessert. Well that did it!   Hey – I’m from the South, what do you expect?   If you cook, I will come!
I arrived and sat in the back corner.  While I was chatting with the people around me in the living room, I looked up at the front where there was a display of kitchen tools on a table.  The kitchen lady started making the Banana Split Pizza… brownie for a crust… chocolate syrup, banana and strawberry slices… oh-my-goodness. She explained what she was doing step-by-step in a fun way.  Before I knew it, the pizza was made.  That was it?  It was so simple!

I was hooked. I got my kitchen KIT and was so excited – like a kid at Christmas. I didn’t know what half of the stuff was supposed to be used for, but yay! Fun toys!  My supportive mother-in-law purchased a bunch of stuff, and so did her friends. I survived!! I succeeded! Well, I won’t mention how many crusts I burned. Or how many times I accidentally put sugar in a recipe that called for salt.  Or the time I literally BLEW UP my hosts microwave and chocolate went ALL over her kitchen counter, in her stovetop, and stained her cabinets.  Good lord.  Did I mention to you that I’m also extremely clumsy?   I am so glad that the company I was with carried insurance on their consultants mishaps… I am pretty sure they implemented that policy when they received my consultant agreement.

When I moved to Texas I joined another company, and was very successful with that company as well, by immediately applying the same principles.  With both companies, I led training calls for consultants.  People do business with those that they LIKE.  We support our friends in their endeavors. Women are naturals at nurturing.

The Heart Link Network is designed to help women in business create those REAL relationships with each other;  The Heart Link Network is a marketing tool for women to connect with each other in an atmosphere where they can feel safe, warm, and comfortable sharing who they are “behind the business card”.

So why am I sharing this with you. I would really appreciate your support…

Direct Selling News.com is looking for 100 people/companies that are enhancing the growth and perception of the Direct Selling model of doing business. They are looking for 100 people/companies that are making a positive difference for direct sales consultants, and who are making it possible for direct sales consultants to grow their business. I believe  The Heart Link Network definitely fits within this category!

Heart Link Network events are the perfect venue for Direct Selling consultants to show who they are, share their passion and their excitement, and make lasting connections.  Please help us by nominating Dawn Billings, our Founder and The Heart Link Network as one of the 100.

We really appreciate your nomination.  It only takes a couple of minutes. Here is the link:

http://www.directsellingnews.com/index.php/site/nominate/

Thank yo, we truly do appreciate your help and support.
Sincerely,
Laura Wells, President of The Heart Link Network

I read this article by Dave Logan | August 25, 2010. He teaches at USC and both of my sons are USC graduates. I have to admit, I really enjoy his writing style. Although he gets a little cranky about business books, he has a unique perspective on their value. I have my own perspective so I have included comments within his original article. Dave’s articulate and carefully thought-out words are in black mine are simply gray.

I read more business books than anyone I know, which is ironic because I can’t stand most of them.  That’s not to say I hate all business books — after all, I’ve written one — but 95% go on one of two lists: “if you don’t know this already, you should be working at the DMV” and “if you do these things, your company will become the DMV.” Okay, you have to confess Dave is clever. But consider the DMV’s strategy. They don’t want us there. They have to deal with us. They are not attempting to grow their business, they simply want the end of the day to hurry up and get here. I am now going to use a story that Dave might decide has a complete lack of insight, but here goes anyway.

I just recently moved to Arizona and had to register my car. They have their customers seating set up in a circle so everyone can feel very uncomfortable looking at each other. As a recovering shrink it made me want to break into “group” mode and start asking everyone how they felt about the long wait, and bad drivers license pictures, but I would have been interrupted by the loud speakers that kept announcing the numbers we were instructed to take as we entered. The last time I took a number I was in line for ice cream and it was much more fun. Anyway, back to business, although uncomfortable, this DMV was kickin tires and takin names (pun intended).

Back to Dave’s articulate thoughts: A cynical view? I don’t think so.  Here’s why.

First, most business books use stories to cover over their complete lack of insight. This week, I read a galley of a book that I hope will never come out.  After some catchy anecdotes about hero CEOs, it advised, among other things, that leaders figure out what’s really important, then do those things. It went way out on a limb by saying that great leaders are remarkable at forming relationships.  And (are you sitting down?) the best leaders are honest when a strategy isn’t working.

Are you kidding me? How about we add that true leaders can dress themselves, use full sentences, and bathe before work. What Dave might not be considering is how often people need to be reminded of the important basics. “You should brush your teeth and floss twice a day.” “You should not allow your small children to play in traffic.” (Teenagers, well that’s another article) Everyone knows how to lose weight. The rules are very basic. The secrets aren’t secrets at all. Cut down the garbage we put in our mouths, increase the amount of fresh fruits and vegetables, eat less, exercise more – there you have it, but that doesn’t stop the market from being flooded with diet books. People probably own more diet books than they do fluffy business books. There you go Dave, another article – 4 Reasons Why Diet Books Make You Fat

Second, the stories themselves often highlight the wrong message. Here’s an example. I mentioned Zappos in a talk I gave, and Tony Hsieh, the CEO, was kind enough to endorse my work. Now I get lots of emails asking for an introduction to him. Hey, I would love to meet Tony too. I love the name Tony, it is my husband’s name and I named my oldest son Tony. I guess we are not very original are we? But since I have two Tonys, will that help my chances of getting introduced to Tony Hsieh? I almost never pass them on. Why? Because Tony, like me, is tired of repeating what no one ever hears: the Zappos story isn’t about Tony. It’s about a group of people that aligned on the same vision of what that company could become and pulled it off by sacrificing, working hard, and participating. If people copy only Tony’s actions, they won’t end up with a Zappos; they’ll end up bankrupt. Okay, I have to agree, nothing great ever happens in a vacuum. No great man or woman does anything alone. But I would still like to meet Tony Hsieh.

Business success isn’t a checklist, and that’s the implied message from many business books: do these things and you’ll be the hero. Business success is a dance: with the market, employees, investors, customers, landlords, and creditors — not to mention spouses and kids. I love Dave’s dance analogy. I was a ballroom dancer in my early days when my thighs were not jello and gravity had not abused other important parts of my body, but I digress. Business success, or any success, as Dave suggests, is a dance. When dancing two people need to keep a balance of positive tension, control, self-responsibility, and coordination in order for the dance to be strong and beautiful. Both partners need to do their job full out and know they can depend on their dance mate. How wonderful our relationships and our businesses could be if we remembered these important dance truths. Hey I have an idea, let’s campaign for Dave to be on Dancing with the Stars.

Third, most business books are air sandwiches: empty in the middle.  One of my mentors told me to read the first and last chapters of a book, because everything in the middle is either stories or takeaways so simple that watching Mr. Rogers is a better use of your time.  I’m too obsessive-compulsive to follow this advice, but in 95% of cases, it would be better if I had. One of my friends, Larry Winget (talk about a character who definitely needs to be on Dancing With the Stars) told me that no one reads past the first 50 pages of a book, if they get that far. I have often wondered if I wrote a 250 page book and only had copy on the first 50 pages and the last 20 pages, how many people would really ever find out there was nothing in the middle. If I had more time in my life to waste, I would try this experiment and find out.

Business leaders need a reboot on the ideas that make organizations run. Is your time best spent reading business books, or talking with people with radically different ideas? Put down the business book and go interact with ideas that challenge you, frighten you, or piss you off. Okay, I have to confess this is my favorite part of Dave’s article. This is a real call to action. In fact I think Dave should write a new book and every page of the 100 pages or so should have this one paragraph repeated on it. They say people learn by repetition. This would be a best seller for sure.

People often ask me what the best business books I’ve ever read are.  Here’s my list: The Odyssey, Atlas Shrugged, and Ender’s Game.  None are about commerce or strategy. Read The Odyssey to understand character, purpose, and discovery.  Read Atlas Shrugged to clarify your own position on how the political economy should run.  And read Ender’s Game for how genius and leadership pull people in opposite directions. (Two of the three are well written — you can figure out which is the outlier.)

None of these books have takeaways, or to-do lists. None preach. They will make you think.

Anyone brave enough to venture into these waters with me?  What are your favorite non-business books that teach you a lot about business? Yes, I do have a recommendation. I think anyone who wants to learn about business and great leadership should read a fable I wrote entitled, The Perfect Heart. No lists, no outright preaching, but definite take aways about how to use the best gifts and talents of everyone to make a kingdom the kind of kingdom that meets the needs of all of its citizens, while allowing excellence of each individual. Oh by the way, the heroes in the fable are female. Yep, not a lot of fables with female heroes, but I promise you will enjoy this one. If you would like a copy just email me at dawn@theheartlinknetwork.com or visit my website www.DawnBillings.com. All proceeds go to women and children charities.

Dawn L Billings is the author of over 20 books (mostly fluff) and hundreds of articles on parenting, relationships, entitlement and networking and an ardent advocate for womens and children’s issues. Dawn is the creator of the new parenting toy/tool called Capables. And CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Womens Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory, The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organization and online community. In 2008 Dawn was selected by Oprah Magazine and The White House project as one of 80 emerging women leaders in the nation. Find out more and buy Dawn’s books To learn more about women networking check out our videos

By Dawn Billings, Founder / CEO of The Heart Link Women’s Network

When I was younger my mother used to tell me that “birds of a feather, flocked together.” I was not particularly interested in the meaning behind the saying at the time but I have come to realize that your life and the things that you are truly dedicated to, show up in who you are associated with and who you choose to spend your time and life energies around.

In 2008, I had the great honor to be chosen as one of 15 “Women of Achievement” in the state of Georgia by the YWCA. As I read my name associated with the other extraordinary women I was humbled.
Dawn Billings, CEO and founder of the Heart of a Woman and the Heart Link Network; state Rep. Charlice Byrd (R-Woodstock); state Rep. Sharon Cooper (R-Marietta); Lillian Darden, executive director of Foundation of Wesley Woods; Nancy Desmond, CEO of the Gingrich Group/Center for Health Transformation; Helen Goreham, Cobb commissioner; Anne Hancock, regional representative, U.S. Department of Education; Vickie Haney, vice president of Bank of North Georgia; Denise Harden, vice president, commercial banking, SunTrust; Kimberly Paris, development officer of the WellStar Foundation; Holly Walquist, Marietta councilwoman; and Julie Whitehead, chief engineer, C-5M, Lockheed Martin.

As I stood next to these women, my only desire was to be worthy of their association. 

Then again in 2008, I had another amazing and distinct honor to be selected to be among 80 women, chosen out of over 3200 in the nation as women who had socially dynamic programs that could help change the world and were dedicated to making a difference in the world for others. Once again, I found myself sitting in a room in NYC surrounded by women of such great stature and heart that it took my breath.

That is why, now more than ever I am completely dedicated to continuing to grow, support, nurture and expand The Heart Link Women’s Network, so that women around the world can continue to find themselves standing tall next to, or their hearts “linked” with amazing women because we know that women leaders “linked” can, and do, change the world.

Birds of a feather do flock together. Let us become one flock, dedicated to the betterment of mankind, dedicated to eliminating hunger, violence, poverty, ignorance, pollution, abuse, isolation, depression and intolerance.

As women, we have a unique and vital opportunity to use what is best about us, to completely change the world. Visit Women Lifting the World, inspirational videos that uplift and encourage the hearts of those who view them, Heart-Notes Garden, a virtual garden where you can plant a flower and send it with a brief message to someone you love, and the GOD CAN, a place to go and release any frustrations and fears that have you ruminating, as well as, a place to write a note of thanks and praise for a God that is so good to you, all free resources that we have created to enhance and improve the lives of women.

Sweet blessings, find a new friend and get “linked” to greatness.  Dawn L Billings www.TheHeartLinkNetwork.com

Dawn L Billings is an ardent advocate for women’s and children’s issues, the author of over 20 books and hundreds of articles on parenting, relationships, entitlement and networking.  Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Womens Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory and The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organizations and communities. Dawn is the creator of the NEW Parenting Tool called Capables, a revolutionary parenting tool and Toddler toy that ends whining and tantrums for good. In 2008 Dawn was selected by Oprah Magazine and The White House project as one of 80 emerging women leaders in the nation. Find out more and buy Dawn’s books

by Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Womens Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory and The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organizations and communities.

My fourth professional networking tip is to listen as though your business depends on it, because it does.

Professional networking is a developed skill. At first, don’t focus on selling. Instead focus on listening. I know that you intend to use networking as a way to increase your sales, thereby building your business, but one of the worst things you can do is to overwhelm a person when you first meet them with YOUR sales pitch. No one likes to be sold. They want to be understood, listened to and cared about and then, they have room in their hearts to hear what you have to offer.

When you meet women networking for the first time, use it as an opportunity to learn. One of the best ways we learn is by listening.In fact we learn twice as much by listening, that is why we have two ears and only one mouth.

Everyone loves to talk about them, even if they are shy. Give a new acquaintance a chance to teach you about them. Listen. Get to know them. Don’t try to sell them anything. Rather, begin by giving them something everyone wants; to be listened to. This may sound like a colossal waste of time, but I assure you, it is the best time you will ever spend. Once a person feels listened to, they become much more open to listening and learning about you.

Women small business owners need many opportunities to share what they are passionate about, women entrepreneurs can often feel fragile because the weight is all on their shoulders. So when you are attending a professional networking event, listen carefully to the other women business owners and you will discover, they are just like you and you know YOU want to be listened to . . . right?

Dawn L Billings is an ardent advocate for women’s and children’s issues, the author of over 20 books and hundreds of articles on parenting, relationships, entitlement and networking.  Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Womens Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory and The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organizations and communities. In 2008 Dawn was selected by Oprah Magazine and The White House project as one of 80 emerging women leaders in the nation. Find out more and buy Dawn’s books To learn more about women networking check out our videos

by Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Womens Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory and The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organizations and communities.

My third professional networking tip is a rule you learned in kindergarten.  After you meet, and greet – SHARE.

After you have met the new and interesting people I recommended you meet in professional networking tip number two, take them and find the people you already know, and like, and introduce them to each other. This is a wonderful and easy way for you to stay connected to those you already know, while helping the people you just met.

As you share your old and new acquaintances, you will automatically expand your circle of influence. Everyone loves to be introduced. Your already established acquaintances love it when you introduce the new people you have met and it gives them an opportunity to introduce the new people they have met to you.

Remember, just an introduction is not sufficient. When you introduce two people it is wise to tell each of them about the other. Be courteous and a bit flattering. You can tease people you know well, but make sure that everyone knows it is just good fun and never let that be your primary way of relating to others.

Another benefit of sharing is that introducing new acquaintances to established acquaintances will help you solidify them in your memory. And if you are like me, your memory can use the help. : )

Dawn L Billings is an ardent advocate for women’s and children’s issues, the author of over 20 books and hundreds of articles on parenting, relationships, entitlement and networking.  Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Womens Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory and The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organizations and communities. In 2008 Dawn was selected by Oprah Magazine and The White House project as one of 80 emerging women leaders in the nation. Find out more and buy Dawn’s books To learn more about women networking check out our videos

Professional Women Networking Tip: 2 from The Heart Link Womens Network

by Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Womens Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory and The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organizations and communities.

My second professional networking tip is logical but not necessarily intuitive. Meet as many NEW people as you can.

When you first arrive at a networking event, avoid gravitating to people you already know and like. Of course, this is the most natural thing for people, especially women, to want to do, but after thanking the host, you should immediately find someone NEW to introduce yourself to. Networking is about meeting NEW people. This doesn’t mean that you have to ignore those you already know and love, but make sure you meet new people and introduce them to those you already know and love.

Challenge yourself to meeting at least 3 to 4 new people each time you attend a business networking event. This challenge will help you to get in the right frame of mind and focus on why you chose to attend the event in the first place.

Remember networking is all about meeting NEW people and creating NEW relationships. When you attend a networking event you need to be focused on expanding your circle of influence. Outside of networking events, you can meet your new and old friends for coffee, a jog in the park, a protein shake, or even a yoga class. But at the meeting, do what you came to do—MEET new people.

Dawn L Billings is an ardent advocate for women’s and children’s issues, the author of over 20 books and hundreds of articles on parenting, relationships, entitlement and networking.  Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Womens Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory and The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organizations and communities. In 2008 Dawn was selected by Oprah Magazine and The White House project as one of 80 emerging women leaders in the nation. Find out more and buy Dawn’s books To learn more about women networking check out our videos

9 Ways we can help our kids to fall in love with exercise?

by Dawn Billings

As parents, we want to do whatever we can to give our kids an opportunity to have healthy, productive and happy lives. We save for their college educations. We take them for regular doctor appointments. We buy them cute clothes. We try to make sure they eat the right foods; at least I hope that we are conscious of the foods our children are eating. But what about exercise? How much exercise do your children get each day?

Researchers tell us that kids who exercise regularly are less likely to struggle with their weight, but more importantly, they have less of a risk of developing type 2 diabetes and have lower blood pressure and cholesterol levels than kids who sit around playing video games. In addition, studies show that they sleep better and handle physical and emotional stress more easily.

And here’s a key thing for parents to understand: the exercise habits your children form when they are young will likely be the ones they’ll carry with them into adulthood.

9 Ways we can help our kids to fall in love with exercise?

1. Make it fun.

First, don’t make exercise feel like exercise. Exercise can feel like a hard job if it is boring and strenuous. There are many adults that dread “exercise”. We don’t want to make physical activity something our children dread. So first thing we must do it make moving, jumping and running around, FUN. Come up with a challenge. Who can do the most pushups in a minute? Who can swim the fastest lap in the pool? Race your kids to the mailbox. Or have them race each other. Children love the “Watch me” game. They will do anything over and over if you will just watch them. They’ll keep jumping in and out of the pool, they will continue to do cartwheels until they are dizzy, they will even race until they are ready to drop, if we will take the time to watch. What is better than watching – joining. Imagine how good of shape you could be in, if you ran, jumped and twirled with them?  When kids are focused on a goal or trying to win, especially if they’re trying to beat their parents, exercise can be twice as fun.

2. Limit TV.

Any parent knows that TV can make mush out of your child’s brain. So turn the TV off. According to the Kaiser Family Foundation, kids under the age of 6 watch an average of 2 hours of TV a day, while kids and teens from 8 – 18 years spend almost 4 hours a day watching TV and almost 2 additional hours playing video games or spending time on the computer. Some experts agree that most children will spend more time watching television before the age of six-years-old then they will spend in sit down, face-to-face conversations with their dads over their entire lifetime.

Set limits on the amount of TV time your children can have. Find what works for your family and create a schedule for no TV on weekdays or weekends. The time freed up will open doors for other activities and a change of scenery can go a long way in turning the way your child experiences and remembers their life.

3. Get up and out.

Whether your children are young or old, be intentional about getting outside with them. My son’s are 22 and 31 and we still all go to play putt-putt golf, or ride bikes or take a hike. Take advantage of local parks and nature trails. For your younger children, climbing on a play set and swinging from the monkey bars can be great exercise. Find out what sports or activities your kids enjoy and sign them up. Look into your city’s Parks and Recreation department and see what classes or teams are offered. If your children are older like mine, plan a hike and have them invite a friend. Or get them a new football or Frisbee and toss the first throw. Have your kids try a variety of activities, in doing so, they will find one or two they love and so will you.

4. Drive less.

Is your kids’ school within walking distance? If so, walk or ride bikes to school. What about their friend’s houses? If you have young children, walk with them instead of driving. Leave the stroller at home, and leave the house early so you have time to stop and let them look at bugs or smell the flowers without being late. Make getting to places an adventure. Children love adventures. If your kids are older, add something they might consider fun. Walk to the movie rental store and let them pick out the movie or video game. Ride bikes to soccer practice and have them lead the way. They may not be enthused about the idea at first, but your enthusiasm and example can be contagious. There are many side benefits to keeping your kids active. It requires that you stay active, and it’s good for the environment too.

5. Park in the furthest parking spot.

Many people are busy trying to get a close parking spot. Make a fun habit of parking far away from the door. This small habit can adds thousands of extra steps for your entire family each week. Your children’s friends will talk about the experience with their parents and if they aren’t too busy making fun of you behind your back, they just might copy the idea for their family.

6. Be a great example.

Maybe the most important thing parents can do to encourage our kids to be active is to be active in our own lives. Take the stairs instead of using elevators. Again, every step adds up. Make exercise a priority, even if you can only fit a ten-minute walk or a thirty-minute exercise video into your day. It will go a long way in reducing the stress that often comes with parenting. Kids learn more from what we do than what we say, and a child who grows up seeing his or her mom or dad living healthy, active lives will most likely follow in their running shoes.

7. Teach your children to eat a rainbow every day.

Children need lots of fresh fruits and colorful vegetables to round out their nutrition. The better food we put into our bodies, the more energy we have. The more energy we have the more we feel like exercising for fun. Teach your children to love rainbows, especially when it comes to their food.

8. Remember Goldilocks and the Three Bears.

Don’t make exercise too hard or stressful and certainly do not lay around and not do enough to keep your kids strong. Find that place in your routine that is “just right”.  Exercise does not have to be difficult to strengthen and benefit your children. The most important critical aspect of exercise is consistency.

9. Hmmm . . . Did I mention FUN?

Although I started with this one, I thought I’d end with it as well for dramatic emphasis. Honestly parents, the only thing you want to weigh a ton in your famly is FUN. We are facing a weight epidemic with our children. We need to make eating and working out fun and interesting. Our kids model our attitudes and beliefs. Whether they are watching our attitudes around food, exercise, or overall care for ourselves. Make health a fun and positive part of your everyday routine. Invite your kids to go bike riding, take a hike, and play tennis or jump rope. Bring them to the gym with you. Play basketball in the driveway.  Whatever you do, the only thing you want to weigh a ton in your family, is FUN!

So, share about you. Did your parents teach you eat well, or to love exercise?
How do you fit exercise into your busy day, or what are the challenges you’ve faced in trying to do this? What are some of your kids’ favorite physical activities?
Do you have great ideas you can share with other parents?
I look forward to hearing your tips and thoughts.

Dawn L Billings is an the author of over 20 books and hundreds of articles on parenting, relationships, entitlement and networking, and an ardent advocate for women’s and children’s issues.  Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Women’s Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory and The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organizations and communities.

Dawn is the creator of the NEW Parenting Tool called Capables, a revolutionary parenting tool and Toddler toy that ends whining and tantrums for good. In 2008 Dawn was selected by Oprah Magazine and The White House project as one of 80 emerging women leaders in the nation. Find out more and buy Dawn’s books,  Women Lifting the World inspirational videos to uplift the hearts of those you love, and the NEW Toddler Teaching Toys called CAPABLES Dawn is also the architect of the Primary Colors Personality Test

Take the opportunity to attend a Heart Link Women’s Network networking event. Check out our women networking events and find a gathering near you! You will be so glad you did. Also check out - TROVA NOW Women Business Directory, and TROVA Business Directory for all small businesses. TROVA in Italian means “Find”. Would you like for your business to be found easily both locally and nationally? That is what our new business directories TrovaBusinessDirectory.com and TrovaWomenBusinessDirectory.com are all about. For more information about how to get your women owned business listed for FREE visit: TrovaNow

by Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Womens Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory and The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organizations and communities.

What is professional networking and why is it important?.

A professional networking event is really nothing more than an organized, or sometimes unorganized, way to get to meet people you might otherwise never meet. Networking is nothing more than socializing with focus, purpose, and if you are lucky, fun.

Networking for some women can feel similar to a trip to the dentist. Networking can feel frightening to some. Professional women know how important it is to go, but they are do not look forward to the experience  and often experience a great deal of anxiety. For others, networking events are truly enjoyable; they can’t wait to arrive and begin the networking process. So makes these same events feel differently to people? A couple of the things that truly impact how you feel about networking is your confidence around networking and meeting people and your attitude. If you feel confident, and have an optimistic and excited attitude, networking can be as fun as it is, effective.

Regardless of your feelings about networking, when you decide to attend an event, it’s important to choose to arrive with the proper perspective. Your goal should not be to take the room by storm and hold everyone you meet hostage until they make a commitment to do business with you, although I have attended a couple of events where I felt that was the perspective of the people in attendance. But, if you really want networking to work for you, I will share 33 important networking tips from my ebook Tips that can help you create a Real Buzz at Networking Events that can help you to not only succeed, but to enjoy yourself whenever you are networking.

Women Entrepreneurs Professional Women Networking Tip 1:

After all is said and done, networking is really about earning the right, privilege, honor, and respect to be able to meet with someone again. It is the beginning of a potentially great and powerful relationship. As with all beginnings, how we handle them determines how strong our later relationship will be.

A Networking event is not a license to sell yourself, but an opportunity to meet new people and begin to build actual relationships. If you desire to sell yourself and showcase your products and services, building relationships is the very best, most powerful, and effective way to do it.

Dawn L Billings is an ardent advocate for women’s and children’s issues, the author of over 20 books and hundreds of articles on parenting, relationships, entitlement and networking.  Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Womens Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory and The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organizations and communities. In 2008 Dawn was selected by Oprah Magazine and The White House project as one of 80 emerging women leaders in the nation. Find out more and buy Dawn’s books To learn more about women networking check out our videos

by Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Womens Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory and The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organizations and communities.

In church on Sunday we were talking about the things that separate us and cause conflict. My mind drifted as I asked myself, being a recovering shrink, what brings us together. I was surprised when I looked at my notes and realized it was the same list.

The minister said that
Values, (things we value and ideas we hold dear to our hearts)
Priorities (priorities are what we create out of the things we value)
Affections (we love and cherish what we value and most believe in)
and Direction (out of our values, we develop our priorities and establish our affections which tell us what direction to go with our lives)

So Values, Priorities, Affections and Direction bring us together with those who share our values and separate us from those that don’t.

I saw this all the time when I had my private practice. Couples would come in and one would value time together while the other would value a strong work ethic. Or one would value service love and another would value words of affirmation and they always came to me with the same directive – Fix the other person!

When your values are different, your priorities and affections and the direction you choose are naturally different. This doesn’t just destroy personal relationships, business relationships, it destroys communities, countries and the world on a global level. We are talking about the most basic, overarching, difficult aspect of being human. As human beings, we have the capacity to choose our values. We have long left the periods of time when our days were consumed with finding, killing and preparing food, just so we could start over. Survival used to be the number one priority to human beings. Now, we have time to cultivate, feed and strengthen our values and as we do, we make those around us who have different values – WRONG! And just like that . . . Conflict is born.

Our world is full of conflict. Should there be a Mosque near the 911 site? Should white crosses that represent fallen officers be forced down by an Atheist group because one side says everyone knows that white crosses represent people who have died, while the other side insists that white crosses can only mean ONE THING, that Christianity is being forced on innocent Atheist as the drive by. Should we drill offshore? Should we allow prayer in schools? What does the word Marriage mean? Should women have the right to abortions, or should the babies have a right to life? Should parents be subsidized to send their children to any school they wish? On and on the conflict rages. Who is right? Who is wrong? Right and wrong are defined depending on the values that someone holds dear.

So the minister was correct. Values, priorities, affections and Direction bring us together. We want to find people who believe like us, see the world like we do, cherish the same values we cherish, and stand for the same things we stand for and if they don’t, we want to stop them, demean them, chastise them, make them wrong, demonize them, scream at them, call them names, shoot them, stab them, and in the end – kill them.

What is the answer? Many say the answer is obvious, it is TOLERANCE.

But we witness daily on the news, in our families and in our communities, tolerance is a word cracked as a whip by those who want OTHERS to be tolerant of their values, priorities, affections and direction. Usually those demanding understanding and respect are the same people who are showing no understanding or respect for people who have values different from their own. It saddens me to see how easily groups can vilify one another and how hideously cruel people can be to each another.

This is an issue I hope we can begin a conversation about over the next month or so.

Please share your comments and ideas as we wrestle with this very powerful issue of being human. Blessings, Dawn Billings

Dawn L Billings is the author of over 20 books and hundreds of articles on parenting, relationships, entitlement and networking and an ardent advocate for womens and children’s issues. Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Womens Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory, The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organization and online community, and the creator of the new parenting toy/tool called Capables. In 2008 Dawn was selected by Oprah Magazine and The White House project as one of 80 emerging women leaders in the nation. Find out more and buy Dawn’s books To learn more about women networking check out our videos

In Today’s Economy, What is enough?

by Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Womens Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory and The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organizations and communities.

Recently I read an article about the phrase “I wish you enough.” The story was about a mother and daughter saying a heartfelt, emotional good-bye to one another at an airport. I am a complete emotional sap, so I love stories like this one.

The mother was very old and both women knew that this might be their last opportunity to tell each other the things they most wanted to say. This story took me back to when my mother was fighting cancer and the important words we shared just before she died.

Both this mother and daughter chose to say to one another, “I love you and I wish you just enough.” When asked about the phrase “I wish you just enough,” the mother replied that is was a phrase that had been handed down in her family for generations. She explained, “When we say ´I wish you just enough´ we wish for those we care about to have a life filled with just enough to make them happy.”

“For example, I wish you just enough sun to keep your attitude bright.
I wish you just enough rain to appreciate the sun.
I wish you just enough challenge to keep your spirit strong.
I wish you just enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.
I wish you just enough gain to satisfy your needs.
I wish you just enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.
I wish you just enough happy hellos to get you through your sad good-byes.”

What is enough? We are living in a world of great excess, where the word enough is only used in sentences where it is paired with the word “not” in front of it. How many times a day do you hear the words “not enough” spoken in conjunction with one another? Can you think of anyone who has made a great deal of money for example and then decided that they have enough money to meet their needs, so from this day forward every penny they make will go to those who have less. Have you ever heard of someone being offered the Clearing house sweepstakes and say, “No thank you. Give it to someone else, I have just enough.”

The fact is that we live in a world focused on “Just a Little More” not “Just Enough”. It is this desire for more that drives people to spend more than they earn, charge more than they can afford, and put themselves into the kind of financial jeopardy that can cause them enough stress to ruin their health. It is this same mind set that has our nation and its economy on the verge of disaster. Therefore, I wish you just enough!

I wish you just enough hope to keep your spirits high.
I wish you just enough pain, to help you recognize it and ease it in the hearts of others.
I wish you just enough confidence to risk the dreams in your heart.

Speaking of enough, there are places in our lives where we might not feel like we have enough knowledge to be the great parents we dream of being. Everyone dreams of positive parenting but this is one area we might not get “enough” help. There are new Toddlers Toys that is also a toddler tool for parents to use to teach their children to be great adults. There are many Toddler toys out there, but never has there been  toddler learning toys that provides powerful parents advice on how to raise extraordinary children.

Dawn L Billings is an ardent advocate for women’s and children’s issues, the author of over 20 books and hundreds of articles on parenting, relationships, entitlement and networking.  Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Womens Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory and The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organizations and communities. In 2008 Dawn was selected by Oprah Magazine and The White House project as one of 80 emerging women leaders in the nation. Find out more and buy Dawn’s books

by Dawn Billings, Founder of The Heart Link Network® for professional women business owners, TROVA Business Directory and TROVA Women Business Directory and creator of the new Parenting tool/toy called Capables

I have been asked many times, does the use of visualization techniques really help someone achieve their goals in life? Research tells us the answer is yes. But I believe it is especially important for women entrepreneurs.

Perhaps you know someone who uses mental rehearsal, or visualization.
Many great athletes, executives, entrepreneurs and other successful people use visualization to help them improve their performance and develop their skills. It is considered a standard tool used by many Olympic and professional athletes, as well as people who simply want to develop new behaviors. But I have found that women entrepreneurs and women in general, spend more time visualizing, hoping and dreaming for the people they love, than they do for themselves. This is one of the beautiful things about being a woman, as a gender, we have enormous hearts and we dream big for those we love. But we must take the time to include ourselves and our dreams. We must be disciplined to spend as much time visualizing and dreaming our dreams as we do visualizing for our children, friends and loved ones.

How does visualization work? It is simple rally, human beings think in the form of words, which trigger pictures and emotions. Emotions are very important when we visualize. They are the fuel that lifts our dreams into reality. Our subconscious cannot tell the difference between something we imagine vividly, with great passion, and a “real” experience. As long as we feel the vision passionately, our subconscious believes it IS real. So what we envision with a burning desire to have, our subconscious begins to manifest.

Actually we all use visualization to one extent or another. Whenever we look forward to something and create a picture in our mind of how we want it to be, we are using visualization even though we may not realize it at the time. The most difficult challenge anyone will face in their lifetime is the challenge to control the thoughts that fill their heads. Listen girls, I know how difficult this is. I teach this stuff and truly believe in the power of thoughts and visualization and yet, it is extremely difficult to keep those nagging fears, anxieties and worries from clouding my vision. It takes incredible discipline, dedication and determination to visualize your future with the passion necessary to turn your dreams into reality.

Visualization helps you direct your thoughts by allowing you to project yourself into the future where you can witness the outcomes you most desire. There are many real life benefits to visualization around even simple tasks, for example, if you are nervous about meeting new people in your community, and yet know that it is critical to growing your business, just relax and picture yourself meeting new people with confidence and ease. Picture every little detail, and see you speaking enthusiastically, passionately and powerfully, and listening carefully and respectfully as well. Picture what you are wearing, your posture, and your smile. Hear the words you’ll say. Feel your body, comfortable and relaxed. Your visualization will be aided if you also attend events where you can feel safe, secure and welcomed like The Heart Link Women’s Network, networking for professional women in over 140 locations in the US, Canada and Australia. Once you have attended a few events, you will more easily be able to add details to your visualization exercises, as you picture the outcomes you most desire.

Repeat the visualization process over and over, as if you are watching a movie starring yourself. When it is time to network and introduce yourself to others, your subconscious will kick in to help you do it just like you imagined. It won’t take long until you understand that what you can see and believe, you can achieve.

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Dawn L Billings is an ardent advocate for women’s and children’s issues, the author of over 20 books and hundreds of articles on parenting, relationships, entitlement and networking.  Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Womens Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory and The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organizations and communities. In 2008 Dawn was selected by Oprah Magazine and The White House project as one of 80 emerging women leaders in the nation. Find out more and buy Dawn’s books To learn more about women networking check out our videos

The Major Key to a Better Future is YOU

by Dawn Billings, CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Women’s Network, TROVA Business Directory and TROVA Women Business Directory.

Of all the things that can have an effect on your future, many believe personal growth is the greatest. Many of my heroes, Jim Rohn, Les Brown, Og Mandino, Mark Victor Hasen, Jack Canfield, just to name a few all agree that the growth you invest in now, dramatically impacts, if not predicts the success you will enjoy in the future.

As Jim Rohn would say, “We can talk about sales growth, profit growth, asset growth, but all of this probably will not happen without personal growth. It’s really the open door to it all. In fact I’d like to have you memorize a most important phrase. Here it is, “The major key to your better future is YOU.”

If I can be so bold as to repeat a genius. “The major key to your better future is YOU.”

Write that down. Contemplate it. And if you can truly grasp its significance, put it someplace you can see it everyday. I recommend the bathroom, kitchen, at the office, in your car, anywhere where you can see it everyday.

Of course there are many things that will help you create a better future for yourself. Being aligned with a strong, dynamic, progressive company, that certainly can help. Representing good products, good services that you are proud of, and truly believe in, that can certainly help. If you are lucky enough to have good sales aids, good training, and good leaders, there is no doubt each of those can certainly make a positive difference in your future.  All of these things help, and of course, if you are lucky enough to miss some of life’s terrible storms, that is always a blessing. If your car continues to run. If the children stay well and happy,  that will make your life so much easier. And if prices don’t continue to rise to levels of the ridiculous as our taxes are certainly going to, that will definitely help.   We could go on and on with the list; but the list of things that I’ve just covered, as big as the seem at times, play a minor role in your better future.

As Jim Rohn says,  “The major key to your better future is you.”

Jim used to tell us that the way to develop a great income is simple. All we have to do is become a great person. Develop a great handshake.  Develop a great smile. Develop great excitement. Develop great dedication. Develop a great interest in other people.  If you want more, do more, become more, give more, BE more.

Since Jim Rohn was a complete genius believe him when he said,  “The magic is not in the products. The magic is not in the literature. The magic is not in the film. There isn’t a magic meeting, but the magic that makes things better is inside you, and personal growth makes this magic work for you. The magic is in believing. The magic is in daring. The magic is in trying. The real magic is in persevering. The magic is in accepting. It’s in working. The magic is in thinking. There is magic in a handshake. There is magic in a smile. There is magic in excitement and determination. There is real magic in compassion and caring and sharing. There is unusual magic in strong feeling and you see, all that comes from inside, not outside. So, the difference is inside you. The real difference is you. You are the major key to your better future.”

Dawn L Billings is an ardent advocate for women’s and children’s issues, the author of over 20 books and hundreds of articles on parenting, relationships, entitlement and networking.  Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Womens Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory and The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organizations and communities. In 2008 Dawn was selected by Oprah Magazine and The White House project as one of 80 emerging women leaders in the nation. Find out more and buy Dawn’s books To learn more about women networking check out our videos

by Dawn Billings, CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Women’s Network, TROVA Business Directory and TROVA Women Business Directory.

Good Communication is when you communicate in a way that others can understand and appreciate, but most importantly, it is when you communicate in a way that they can remember and SHARE about you and your services with others.

If you are attending a professional networking event, you probably have something valuable to share with others, why else would you attend? Right?  Whether you sell insurance, give legal counseling, sell a nutritional product, are a health of life coach,  clean gutters, build houses or the hundreds of other services people provide; you know the ins and outs of your particular industry.

You have all of this knowledge and expertise but do people even know what you do, or how to help promote you? That is what great referral marketing is all about. It all begins with good communication.

1. Talk to people with the patience and excitement of teaching children

Experienced professionals can become entrenched within their specific industry and attached to a particular jargon. In this process, they lose the ability to effectively describe themselves and their services to ordinary people who can help market and promote them. Your referral marketing success is often contingent on the people you meet outside of your industry.

2. Forget the Jargon

Save the the acronyms and jargon for industry newsletters and colleagues. Although using superfluous detail and terminology may make you appear intelligent in an abstract way, it might not land you the sale, but instead confuse the person you are talking to. Why risk people being put-off because you make understanding your services a big challenge. Use language and terms that are easy to understand and easy to share. Word of mouth is one of the most important forms of advertising and it won’t be very effective if half the people you count on advocating for you, can’t accurately relay the value of your services.

3. Have you perfected a commercial?

Seriously, you need a well polished commercial. Not so well polished that it seems insincere, but polished enough that people feel that you really know what you are talking about.  People love being impressed with your expertise and sincerity, but hate when they feel that you expect them to be impressed by YOU. Be humble, but be great. Remember, if you are an attorney and can  effectively explain your legal services to a young child, that ability is golden, AND will bring home the gold. If you are a programmer can explain what you do so that someone’s elderly aunt can understand and be excited about it, you will have a huge advantage over your competition.

4. Referrals that never happen are usually because of poor communication

Even something as straightforward as landscaping, or real estate are subject to interpretation:

If you say, “I M the Key Landscaping provides outstanding commercial landscaping services, specializing in tree removal, landscaping masonry, snow removal, and all aspects of planting and landscaping design.”

That is great because later on that day when their brother tells them he needs to redo his patio and might need a mason.  You would say, “ I just met this great guy Chris at I M the Key Landscaping. Here is his card and number. Interview him and see what you think.”

Now imagine if I am not a clear communicator:  “Hi, I’m Chris and I do landscaping, you know, lawns and stuff.”

Later that day when someone’s brother tells them he needs to redo his patio and might need a mason. No one even knows Chris is also a landscaping mason, so he never receives a referral.

5. Listen

Interestingly, many people do not understand that listening is one of the most important communication skills. People love people who actively listen to them. They automatically want to return the favor. When you listen, you gain a virtual Rolodex of people, services and products that you can recommend and when you are recommending others, they want to recommend you.

6. Attend events and meet other professional people to communicate with

If you are the best communicator in the world and are not out meeting people to share those fabulous communication skills with, then they aren’t really doing you any good. Find professional networking venues to attend. There are hundreds available. You might want to check into an industry related networking group, the Chamber of Commerce in your city,  BNI, or if you are a woman you will want to learn about The Heart Link Women Network for professional women who want  to showcase and market their products and services.

7. Have a professional web site that provides clear, concise information about you and your services

Have a professional website for people to learn more about you. Everyone relies on the internet for information. Make sure that your website is well written and provides the kind of information a potential customer will need to choose to do business with you. Because the internet is so critical to growing businesses these days, check into how to advertise online. Trova Business Directory and TROVA Women Business Directory offer free business advertising to all businesses, as well as, opportunities to have an optimized mini web site for pennies a day.

Dawn L Billings is an ardent advocate for women’s and children’s issues, the author of over 20 books and hundreds of articles on parenting, relationships, entitlement and networking.  Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Womens Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory and The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organizations and communities. In 2008 Dawn was selected by Oprah Magazine and The White House project as one of 80 emerging women leaders in the nation. Find out more and buy Dawn’s books To learn more about women networking check out our videos

by Dawn Billings, CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Network and TROVA Business Directory and TROVA Women Business Directory, creator of the new Parenting toy/tool called Capables

When we left off in our moving woes saga, United Van Lines had in every way disappointed and failed me as a customer. I rushed around the town and found a local company that promised to do better.

I packed all of the boxes and put them in categories so that the heavy boxes were in one section, the greenery and very light boxes were in one section, the pictures and fragile items were in another section and the “do not stack on top of” boxes were in a section of their own. I realize that trucks must be packed tightly and well and therefore I wanted the men to understand what could be used as foundation boxes, and foundation furniture. I have moved enough times to understand how the moving process works.

When the new company’s men arrived there were 5 men, but within the first 3o minutes, one of the men challenged the lead movers authority and was sent packing, leaving me as the fifth man. There was no way they were going to get everything packed without the 5 men I requested, they knew it and I knew it and so I began loading the Dollie and carrying out boxes from the home and the garage.

I must say that there were three men, 2 young men who stood about 6′ 4″ and they worked hard. There was another man who truly knew what he was doing in wrapping my furniture, but the lead man was an arrogant, disrespectful, “full of himself” man who refused to listen. I kept going out to the truck to check on the progress and would find him loading heavy boxes on top of fragile pieces of furniture. I would catch him and ask him to correct it and it would completely ignore and disregard what ever I said. I asked him what piece of furniture he was loading the heavy boxes on and he told me a large dresser. I told him I was not moving a large dresser and made him lift the moving pad from the piece of furniture and yep, there was my beautiful buffet with the queen Anne legs. I explained that he could not put heavy boxes on this piece of furniture because of the legs. He assured me he would correct the mistake immediately.

An hour later after the bed and other heavy pieces were loaded I realized that the section of “light” boxes had not been touched, so no, they did not correct the problem and now they explained it was too late and that they were professionals and knew what they were doing and that I could relax. I didn’t believe them for a second.

It took 12 hours to load the 2 trucks. It took them four days to arrive in Phoenix, and then when they arrived at my home to unload, the were exhausted and had not slept. It seemed they drove straight through because they were behind schedule and did not want to spend money on a hotel. They asked if they could sleep on my carpet in my new home. It was definitely not a normal request, but they did look exhausted so I gave them sleeping bags and blankets, pillows, towels for them to go swimming and relax. I wanted them well rested when they unloaded my truck. I put fans in the room in which they would be sleeping on the floor and tried to make them as comfortable as I knew how.

The next day I arrived very early to begin unloading and they were still asleep. The company had asked that I have a certified check for the first 1/2 when they loaded and a certified check for the second half when they unloaded. I of course, complied. I had the certified check in my hand when I was informed by the two men that I needed to return to the bank and get them $1,000 cash and the remaining amount in a certified check because they had no money for food, no money to hire the men that were to help them unload in Phoenix, or the money for gas to return to Oklahoma. I was extremely confused but I called the company and they okay’d the change in payment. When I went to the bank to make the requested changes, the men sat down and refused to unload anything until I returned with the money because they were not going to unload without being paid. I was beyond angry.

Keep in mind it is now lunch time, there is nothing unloaded, they have been there all night and haven’t moved a thing all morning, I had the certified check I was supposed to have, but because they insisted I needed to have the money arranged for differently than I was first instructed they were not going to begin the unloading process!!!!

When I returned with the money, they informed me that it was time for lunch and they were hungry so they were going to get something to eat. No, I couldn’t believe it either. When they finally began to unload the truck I discovered that the pieces I had asked them to pack carefully and only place the light greenery boxes on top of were completely destroyed. The foreman said it wasn’t his fault that the piece of furniture was junk. No, I couldn’t believe he said that either.

What I have learned is that moving is really a very stressful, difficult process. I have also learned that you cannot trust most movers. They do not know what they are doing. Be careful if you must move. Do your homework. Call the Better Business Bureau and get references. I know this seems like a great deal of work, but honestly, it will save you so much grief.

I got a call that a nice family wanted to lease my home in Atlanta and so I needed to jump on a plane to pack up and move the Atlanta home. Yes, the saga, continues. . . .

by Dawn Billings, CEO & Founder of TROVA Business Directory and TROVA Women Business Directory, and The Heart Link Women’s Network

Have any of you moved recently? If you have, I am sorry. If you haven’t, count your blessings. I have moved two homes in the last month, one in Oklahoma and one in Atlanta. Moving is grueling and that is putting it mildly. Some businesses want us to believe they want to and can help.

Have you seen those commercials about United Van Lines on television? I did. I thought yes, I need to use a professional moving company, not just some local mom and her sons truck, but a real professional mover,  because I have some very nice pieces that I want moved “professionally”. Wow, did I have a lot to learn.

My move was scheduled on a Friday morning, no one showed. I waited again on Saturday because the moving company informs you after the fact they have what is called “a window” which really means they do not have to pick up your furniture when they promise they will. I have no idea about “a window” because the man (John) who said he would be in charge of making my move a bearable experience, never mentioned it. At 5:45pm on Saturday, just as the “window” was about the expire, 2 men who did not speak English where you could understand them, showed up in a small truck, did I mention SMALL truck, that they told me was three quarters of the way full to pick up my furniture. When I explained that was not what I expected, nor what I was told they said just give us some boxes and others will be along another day to pick up the rest of your furniture. I said “No, that would not do.” I did not want my belongings on many trucks. I also had them come in and see how big some of my pieces were so they would know that two men could never move me!!! and that a small truck was not going to work. They took pictures of my furniture with their phone to send to their boss.

I called the company, the supervisors name was Pauline and she told me that I could not get my deposits back because they HAD shown up in “the window”.

“But their truck was 3/4 full, and there were only 2 men.” I heatedly explained.

“Did you have them open the truck and take a picture?” she asked. “They say they had plenty of room for your stuff.”

Oh my goodness, really? Now, you have to have your phone in picture mode all of the time to protect you from crooks?!

Pauline threatened me with not returning my deposits AND insisted I must give them another chance to make it right. I had already missed my prearranged flight back to AZ because of this companies inability to keep their professional agreements, but now I was being threatened. I thought about it and decided to get other bids but to give them one more chance to “make it right.”

Whew! Now, I thought, at least they understand. They have photos. You see they refused to send anyone out in advance. They said they do not do it that way any more. It is a guessing game. You tell them what you think you have, they guess how much it weighs and give you a binding bid, the trick is, they underestimate your load so they can charge you much higher fees later when your load weighs more than they estimated.

But, I was optimistic. Now that they have pictures, they will send the appropriate number of men and the right size truck. They simply did not understand before. After all, this IS UNITED VAN LINES right? WRONG!!!

Four days later 5 men who barely spoke words I could understand (since I did not speak Serbian), arrived late once again, took one look at the heavy furniture and explained with some passion and yelling,  they were not going to move me. That’s right. Movers refused to move me. They said they each only earned $2,000 a month ($100 a day) and if they scratched expensive furniture it would come out of their pay checks. They told me they simply were not paid enough to risk their paychecks and their backs. Which frankly I was relieved because I certainly did not want people moving me who did not know how, nor did they have any desire to do a good job. But this is what you will NOT believe. After all of that, Pauline and the people who work with United Van Lines still did NOT want to return my deposits!!! They were the most unprofessional, unethical, and crooked organization I have ever had the misfortune to attempt to hire. I was treated with complete disrespect and disregard. It was a horrible experience that I do not want any other person to experience.

More of the saga to come:

The 12 Commandments of Business Networking

by Dawn Billings, CEO The Heart Link Network, TROVA Business Directory.com, and TROVA Women Business Directory.com

Networking is a lot of fun! Business networking is all about a group of like-minded business people meeting and greeting to help each other. There are so many networking events for you to choose from. You can meet as often as you wish.

Regrettably, most people start with a networking group by looking for immediate gains, i.e. “What’s in it for me?” If this is your ultimate goal, you might not understand the value of networking, and you will probably be unhappy with your experience.

Many people think that the size of a networking group makes the difference in networking. This is similar to other fallacies with which some people approach life. It is not the size of the group, but the quality of relationships you can build with the people who attend. I would rather belong to a networking group of two people who have the heart to help each other on a regular basis then have a large group of business people who you don’t really know and who are not invested in helping you, or anyone for that matter.

When people complain that they “haven’t got any leads yet!” I always wonder,  “Have you given one to anyone, and if so, how many? Or, have you made a suggestion that might help a fellow member? It takes building a relationship, before you can expect people to be invested in helping you.

To get the most out of your networking experience, you need to build relationships. Not every member will be able to help you, nor will you be able to help them. Help all those who have integrity and follow through and feel good about it.

Networking, like all marketing, is about consistency. Networking is a long-term project. Some people are confused about what networking is all about. They believe that networking is about collecting cards. How can you possibly build a relationship with a person when your objective is to collect cards? Some networking groups make a game out of it to see who can collect the most in a certain time. I personally think this is a waste of business cards! At The Heart Link Women’s Network you receive a roster of every person who attends and all of their contact information so you do not have to collect cards. I think this is marvelous. Networking is about meeting new people and THEN following up.

After the business-networking event is when the real joy begins. Follow up ASAP. Now is the time to send a nice customized card, and call a few days after to arrange a time to meet for a coffee, a walk in the park, a protein shake, a yoga class or to have lunch. That is when you can truly get to know people. Listen to the details of their life. Discover what they have to offer. How can you connect their gifts and talents to others? You might even have the chance to offer your goods and services, after you truly get to know and understand them.

If you want to gain the most out of business networking, follow the Eleven Commandments of Great Networking!

• 1) Thou shalt be sincere and genuine.
• 2) Thou shalt listen carefully.
• 3) Thou shalt build meaningful relationships.
• 4) Thou shalt connect, link and refer.
• 5) Thou shalt help people understand who you are, what you do, and what you need by sharing relevant and pithy stories.
• 6) Thou shalt be clear about the type of referral that would be best for you.
• 7) Thou shalt APPRECIATE and RECIPROCATE.
• Thou shalt be consistent with your networking and marketing efforts.
• 9) Thou shalt BE GRATEFUL and thank the person who gave a referral.
• 10) Thou shalt follow up on the referral within 24 hours.
• 11) Thous shalt live and work with integrity and honesty.
• 12) Thou shalt ask “How can I be of service?”

Business networking is powerful, productive and pretty cool.

Today, when we share information most of the time we are no longer gathering people around us to listen to a proclamation. Instead, sharing has gone viral. But why is social media and “inbound marketing” so important today?

The answer is simple. More than ever before people are finding what they want and need on the internet. With gas prices sky rocketing and the ease of buying online, it simply doesn’t make sense to spend the extra time and money getting in your car and driving, when you can sit in your pajamas and shop. So how do you increase your online presence so that it is easier for people to find you.

One of the most effective methods to increase sales and gain new customers is to get people talking. If you can gain the attention and ultimately the trust of others you can create an online conversation with them. More and more, conversations are going online.

Social online networks are ideally suited to this task allowing you to market you products, services or information directly with customers who are looking for it and want instant information and feedback.

So now more than ever you need to blog. Share your expert information with others who need it. You also need to consider ways to inexpensively, but powerfully advertise online. This is easier said than done. But now Trova Business Directory.com and Trova Women Business Directory.com are hear to serve you. With Platinum and Elite advertising mini-sites you can easily put yourself in the middle of the highway of traffic looking for you. No longer to you have to stand isolated in the Sahara Desert. Learn about how you can advertise and optimize simultaneously for just pennies a day.

It is time to share your way to success.

Dawn L Billings is an the author of over 20 books and hundreds of articles on parenting, relationships, entitlement and networking, and an ardent advocate for women’s and children’s issues.  Dawn is the CEO and Founder of The Heart Link Women’s Network, Trova Women Business Directory and Trova Small Business Directory and The Heart Alliance.com international women’s networking organizations and communities.

Dawn is the creator of the NEW Parenting Tool called Capables, a revolutionary parenting tool and Toddler toy that ends whining and tantrums for good. In 2008 Dawn was selected by Oprah Magazine and The White House project as one of 80 emerging women leaders in the nation. Find out more and buy Dawn’s books,  Women Lifting the World inspirational videos to uplift the hearts of those you love, and the NEW Toddler Teaching Toys called CAPABLES Dawn is also the architect of the Primary Colors Personality Test

Take the opportunity to attend a Heart Link Women’s Network networking event. Check out our women networking events and find a gathering near you! You will be so glad you did. Also check out - TROVA NOW Women Business Directory, and TROVA Business Directory for all small businesses. TROVA in Italian means “Find”. Would you like for your business to be found easily both locally and nationally? That is what our new business directories TrovaBusinessDirectory.com and TrovaWomenBusinessDirectory.com are all about. For more information about how to get your women owned business listed for FREE visit: TrovaNow